THE COACH THEY'LL REMEMBER

Long After the Final Score, Your Words May Still Be With Them

Ask somebody who played sports growing up to name their favorite coach.

Most people won't have to think very long.

Years may have passed. They might not remember the final score of a championship game. They probably can't remember every play their coach drew up.

But they'll remember how that coach made them feel.

They'll remember the coach who believed in them. The coach who challenged them. The coach who wouldn't let them quit. The coach who put an arm around them after a bad game.

And unfortunately, some people remember the opposite.

The coach who embarrassed them. The coach who made them afraid to make mistakes. The coach who convinced them they weren't good enough.

That's the power coaches have.

And sometimes I wonder if we fully understand it.

Research highlighted in a recent Forbes article examining girls in sports and leadership reinforces just how important coaches can be in determining whether young athletes stay involved in sports.

Think about that.

A coach may believe they're simply teaching basketball.

But that relationship could affect whether a young person continues playing at all.

That's bigger than basketball.

And here's where I think coaching sometimes gets misunderstood.

Being a positive coach doesn't mean being an easy coach.

I don't believe young athletes need adults constantly telling them how wonderful they are.

Sports are supposed to challenge you.

A good coach should demand effort. Demand preparation. Demand accountability. Correct mistakes. Sometimes raise expectations higher than the athlete has set for themselves.

That's part of coaching.

But there's a difference between challenging a kid and tearing a kid down.

Great coaches understand that balance.

They can tell you:

That's not good enough.

Without making you believe:

You're not good enough.

That's a huge difference.

The best coaches aren't simply developing players who depend on them for every answer, either.

They're developing thinkers. Leaders. Problem-solvers.

Young people who eventually learn how to coach themselves.

That's the Mind.

A player misses two shots. What happens next?

A teammate makes a mistake. How do they respond?

The referee makes a bad call. Can they control themselves?

They're sitting on the bench. Can they stay engaged?

The team is losing. Can they lead?

A coach has opportunities every day to teach those lessons.

And here's something we should never forget:

Kids are watching us, too.

They're watching how we handle losing.

They're watching how we speak to officials.

They're watching how we treat the last player on the bench compared with the star.

They're watching whether our words match our actions.

We might think we're teaching basketball.

They're learning leadership.

That's why coaching at Play 4 Rings has to mean something bigger than drawing plays, running drills and trying to win championships.

Yes, we're going to compete.

Yes, we're going to keep score.

And yes, we're going to try to win.

But we're also helping shape young people.

Someday these kids won't need us to coach them anymore.

They'll become adults. Parents. Employees. Business owners. Teachers. Community leaders.

Maybe coaches themselves.

And they probably won't remember everything we taught them about basketball.

But there's a good chance they'll remember something we said when they were struggling.

They'll remember whether we believed in them.

They'll remember whether we held them accountable.

They'll remember whether we taught them how to respond when things became difficult.

So coaches, here's a question worth asking:

What will your players remember about you?

Because the scoreboard eventually gets turned off.

The season ends.

The uniform gets put away.

But sometimes the voice of a great coach stays with an athlete for the rest of their life.

Be the coach they'll remember.

Play 4 Rings | Building Triple Threats For LifeTraining the Body, Mind & Will Power for excellence in any arena.